Good conversation

I love good conversations. I think they are one of my favorite things in the world. And this week I was blessed to have 2 really good conversations with 2 good friends. But the one I am still thinking about it the one I had yesterday. I don't even know how Emily and I got on the topic, but we started talking about what I call "I'm right, you're stupid" syndrome that seems to permeate our society. I call it this because as I look at things people post on blogs, on facebook, in the comments of news articles, I see things go very quickly from stating a opinion to name-calling. It's beyond the point of "I'm right, and if you disagree with me, you're wrong," to the point of "I'm right, and if you disagree with me you're the biggest idiot that ever existed and your opinion has no value whatsoever." Hence the name, "I'm right, you're stupid" syndrome. And I know that not everyone is this way, I am blessed to know many people who don't behave this way - online or elsewhere. But many people do behave this way - I see it all the time.

Anyway back to the conversation. As Emily and I were talking about this I had a realization - this is the thing that scares me most about our current society. It's not the people that disagree with me, even those in positions of power. It's not the scary things that are happening in the world. Though both of those things are things I would like to change, they don't scare me nearly as much as the current trend of believing that anyone who doesn't agree with what [I] believe is stupid. (I use the brackets because I am not actually talking about myself in this sense, but that [I] refers to the many people in society who think this way.) Sure I have my opinions, but I think that I respectfully listen to the opinions of others - even when I know when they start that I disagree with them - and even when I know they are not going to change my mind. I look at my friends, and they have such a wide range of political, social, and religious beliefs. And honestly, I think that's good. No, we don't talk about those things a lot, but I think we know the differences are there. But we are friends in spite of these things, and I learn from them and am challenged because I know them.

Sometimes that challenge is simply in having to put my opinion into words. When the only people you ever spend time with agree with you, you never really have to verbalize what you are thinking or what you believe - and that is an important thing to be able to do, so that challenge is good.

And sometimes that challenge is quite directly to what I believe. Sometimes one of my friends will make a point that makes me think about what it is that I believe, and question it. And that is good as well, because it is only through challenges that we grow.

I know I don't have all the answers. And I am equally sure that I have some answers not quite right at the very least, and quite possibly wrong. And that's ok. Because I am willing to listen, to learn, and to grow. And this is what I hope to pass along to the youth that I work with. They don't need me to give them the answers to life's questions - they need me to help them learn how to discover those answers on their own, and what to do when someone else's answers don't match.

And it is when the youth get this that I have hope that our society will move past "I'm right and you're stupid" syndrome to a place of dialogue and respect and a willingness to learn and grow from each other. This is my hope and prayer for our country and our world.