Christmas Reflections

This year I coordinated the Family Christmas Eve service at church. Instead of a single message, I did 3 short reflections. Here are those reflections:

The gift of underachieving

Anyone who has ever had a baby knows how much it changes your life. Two years ago on Christmas day, I found out I was pregnant. Our daughter was born September 1, 2018. I’ll be honest – I had done a lot with kids and while I knew being a parent would be different than any of those things, I felt like I had a pretty good handle on what to expect. I did not; it was still much different than I expected. Harder in some ways. Surprising in others. More emotional in almost every way. She brings me joy that I never knew before. And has taught me so much over the last 15 months. One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned has been to go with the flow. And I was already a pretty laid back person! But in order to find peace in where I am in life, I had to let go of my expectations. My expectations of her as a baby and of myself as a mother. My expectations about parenthood in general. Finding my groove didn’t come from reality matching my expectations but rather from embracing the moment and going with the flow. I’m certainly not perfect at this – but I’m learning.

This same concept came up last month. I started a fitness program that includes a monthly challenge, and in November it was the “underachiever” challenge. This challenge particularly resonated with me because instead of succumbing to the pressure of perfection, she invited us to underachieve at the unnecessary in order to succeed at what matters. It’s a hard concept to learn and if I’m honest it’s something I’ve been learning and relearning my whole life. Because it's a hard thing to do in our culture. And it can be especially hard at Christmas.

Have you fallen into the trap of trying to create the perfect Pinterest Christmas? The shopping, the decorations, the activities – there is so much going on this season that it all seems overwhelming. And we have arrived at Christmas Eve. Maybe you’re feeling a sense of relief a “whew, I got it all done.” Maybe you’re feeling guilty for the activities you missed or the things that were left undone. Maybe you’re still feeling overwhelmed because this is just the beginning of the chaos. Or upset about fights that happened on your way here tonight. Maybe it’s a wish for what might have been if only…

Christmas, like life in general, rarely looks the way we imagine it in our head. Because we are all imperfect people living in an imperfect world. But like Mary, and Joseph, and the Shepherds, and so many others, God invites us into the story. God’s story of love. And redemption. And hope.

So right now, I want to invite you to take some deep breaths. In. And out. In. And out. And as you breath become present in this moment. Letting go of the stress, the anxiety, the busyness, the pressure of perfection that you have put on yourself. Breath in the peace, the hope, the joy, the love that is Christmas. Let’s underachieve together – letting go of what doesn’t matter so we can focus on what does. Because whatever is done or undone, wherever we have succeeded or failed, we are all imperfect people loved by a perfect God who is not keeping score. That is what tonight is about. Let’s worship together.

Finding Joy

Monday night my family went the zoo for Wildlights. Just before we left, we were standing at the pond where the big light show happens every 15 minutes. It was about  10 minutes from when we got to the pond until it began. During that time I was eagerly waiting to see how our 15 month old daughter would react to the show, thinking she would have a look of awe and excitement at all the lights. I was wrong. She watched with a blank face for the first minute or so, pointed a few times at things that caught her attention, and then asked to be held by grandma. Then she proceeded to play with grandma, giggling away at their silly game, totally oblivious to the light show happening behind her, as evidenced in this picture:

It was such a perfect illustration of the difference between the joy of this world – the shiny, flashing lights – and where true joy is found in simple moments of connection. Over and over again, joy shows up where we least expect it. On that Christmas night long ago, it was a baby. A baby placed in a manger that brought joy to the whole world.

Not because God solved all the problems of humanity. We know that’s not true. But because God showed his love for us by becoming one of us. A human. A human who experienced the pain of loss and grief. A human who experienced betrayal. A human who experienced political turmoil. A human who experience friendship and love. And because of all that, we know that Jesus, Immanuel, God is with us. That is where our joy comes from. Not the shiny lights, but the presence of true love that is with us through all of life circumstances because of that Christmas night so long ago.

And so we sing! No matter what our circumstances we sing “Joy to the World” together in this moment. 

Showing Up

Recently I was thinking about the shepherds. They are just doing their jobs in the fields at night and suddenly there is a chorus of angels in the sky singing and telling of a baby born. One of the techniques of Bible study I have learned over the years is to put myself in the story, so I started wondering how I would have reacted. I like to think I would have jumped right in and been on for the adventure of seeing what these angels were talking about. But the people pleaser in me thinks about the fact that I would have had a job to do taking care of these sheep and if I left who would do it? Honestly, I’m not sure how I would have responded. And I undoubtedly would have been second-guessing my decision no matter which way I went.

The truth is we are those shepherds every day with the opportunity to respond to God’s call into the unexpected, the uncomfortable, the unknown. Unfortunately, it’s rarely as clear as a chorus of angels.

One of my favorite Christmas songs from my childhood is Breath of Heaven by Amy Grant. The song reflects on how Mary might have felt and the line that sticks out to me every time is “Do you wonder as you watch my face if a wiser one should have had my place?” I can imagine Mary asking herself that question as I have asked it at many points in my life. I can imagine the shepherd’s asking themselves this question too – “Are we really who you wanted to tell this news to?”

And there are many versions of this question we may ask ourselves: “Am I enough for this challenge that is in front of me?” “Am I good enough to be her mom?” “How will I get through the grief of this loss?” “Why me?” “What is the next step in my journey?”

But then comes the next line of the song “But I offer all I am for the mercy of your plan.” God doesn’t demand perfection from us, but willingness. God doesn’t ask for overachievers, but an offering of what we have and who we are. No more. No less.

It’s not easy. Surrender never is. It calls us to let go of our expectations and to be open to what will come, the opportunities that present themselves.

So as we continue I want to ask you to breathe again. In. Out. In. Out. And be present in this moment. Where is God asking you to be offer yourself? To simply show up open to what will come? Consider that as we continue our worship…

Blessing
The story we celebrate tonight isn’t over. It continues in each of us as we continue to share our experience of Jesus as the imperfect people we are. Go, show up, share the peace, joy, hope, and love of Christmas with all you meet. Merry Christmas!