It's not OK.

On April 20, 1999, I was a junior in high school. I had stayed after school because I had practice for the spring musical, but the rehearsal wasn’t right after school so I had some time to fill between the two. I just didn’t have a ride back to the school if I went home. I remember walking through the cafeteria that afternoon and looking up at the TV. The news was on and it was showing footage of Columbine High School in Colorado. I remember standing there in disbelief. It was one of those things that was difficult to comprehend, because it had never happened before. I mean, we had had bomb scares from my middle school, but those were always some prankster calling from the pay phone in the school to get out of class – and they stopped when the pay phone was taken out. And I remember those bomb threats as being fun times hanging out with my friends instead of being in class. I never thought it could be real. Not until Columbine.

And what breaks my heart is that today's youth have never known a world without school shootings. They have experienced lock downs and "Run, Hide, Fight" drills. Last Sunday at youth group we had an honest conversation about their fears. Students talked about their experiences, close encounters, worry for friends, fear in places other than school, and fear for parents who work in schools. And as I listened to their fears and worries and anxiety, my heart ached because I couldn't tell them that it would be OK. I couldn't tell them that it wouldn't happen here or to them. I couldn't tell them that they were safe in those places where they should be. Because I don't know. And I don't say things I don't mean. 

And that's not OK. We need to do better by our children and teens. We need to listen to the very real experiences and fears they have. And we need to sacrifice our own agendas in order to create a better world for those who come behind us. 

I'm not advocating for any specific solutions, in part because there is no easy answer. It's going to take sacrifice in a number of areas. But we need to be willing to struggle through and give up our own egos in order to create real solutions. We need to have civil conversations on all sides where we listen to hear rather than listening to argue. We need to educate ourselves. And then we need to take real steps forward. 

Our youth are telling us what they need. Are we willing to listen? I can tell you that I, for one, am cheering them on. Because it's not OK and I'm glad they're calling all of us out on that. 

Now let's get to work.